tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85653986123844608572024-03-19T03:43:06.730-04:00Catch the TasteA blog written by 3 guys who are idiots, but love to LOLJordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06801486208120179826noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-60618813939574993122010-02-03T16:40:00.004-05:002010-02-04T16:48:43.571-05:00Internet ProtocolToday's internet lesson is all about posting things on youtube and learning to deal with the consequences. <br />Case in point.<br />If you haven't seen coppercab's video for "Gingers do have souls" you should familiarize yourself with it now:<br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/EY39fkmqKBM&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/EY39fkmqKBM&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />I'm not here to debate whether gingers have souls or not(they probably don't for the record), but this guy is asking for it.<br /><br />And the people delivered. Here are some YouTube comments for that video:<br /><br />- Get the fuck out...fucking soulless, fat, pedophile, christian, boylover...<br /> Gosh I fucking hate you. <br />- You shouldn't be proud mate, your a fucking fat ginger! God took your soul and shit all over it when he made you a ginger. <br />- you're a christian? more like a bitch...<br /><br />Coppercab can't handle all this criticism. He recently posted this on his channel, "I THOUGHT YOU WERE BETTER THEN THAT BUT<br />YOU'RE VIDEO ABOUT ME MOST CERTAINLY PROVES OTHERWISE!<br />I THOUGHT YOU WOULD TAKE UP FOR ME SINCE YOU'VE ALWAYS<br />MADE ME LAUGH BUT INSTEAD YOU HATE ON ME!!! WHY!!??"<br /><br />Moving on to Pruane2Forever, who also goes by the name sexman.<br />His youtube habits include speaking in an annoying voice, endlessly talking about himself and giving retarded reviews of movies and TV shows.<br /><br />Here he is talking about his birthday:<br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/polJJmipcBI&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/polJJmipcBI&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br />I can't believe there is 191 videos of this shit...<br />The comments are usually spot on for his videos too:<br />- God damn and you're still a fucking virgin<br />- WTF man y is there like a 1cm gap between ur fucking teeth man, and why are u such a geek LOOK AT YOU, Spots, braces, chinese eyes, glasses ( in ur other vids) weird fucking hats, i bet u were abused my ur dad, and he forced his lil 3 inch cock down ur neck and came in ur mouth KILLURSELF U FUCKInG MONSTER<br /><br />Gold.<br /><br />The lesson here my friends is never post anything on the internet where people can see your face.<br />By all means, you can still post in your blog how you think <a href="http://catchthetaste.blogspot.com/2010/01/why-do-microphones-look-so-much-like.html">microphones look like dicks...</a><br />You're going to get mocked, but it won't be as bad.Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06801486208120179826noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-88280708980842196132010-01-31T16:28:00.003-05:002010-01-31T18:03:00.504-05:00Toy Reviews - The hidden Treasure of You tubeToday I stumbled upon a variable treasure trove of hilarity. You Tube Toy Reviews!!! It seems completely obvious when you boil it down. These people are complete social misfits, the kind of people who not only obsessively collect action figures, but somehow think that the entire world would be interested in their obsession, so they post videos of them showing off their toy collections, all the while going into the subtle nuances between different versions of the toys, specific articulation, and other points that I don't care to understand.<br /><br />So I thought, lets spin this fucker around, and review these toy review videos!!!<br /><br />We will start off with "robot adventures" an American man child, who left the confines of his parents basement to live in the land of Toys. Japan.<br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/5k4oOggDTmA&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/5k4oOggDTmA&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed><a class="cunjcsskuazjrffgxubb" href="http://www.youtube.com/v/5k4oOggDTmA&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0"></a></object><br /><br />This review starts off running, "Robot Adventures" is brimming with excitement over the new toy his brother sent him, bumbling over the packaging as he barely holds back his need to tear into the thing. The laughs start early too, as our boy strategically hurts himself at exactly the 1 minutes point, just when my attention begins to wane. <br /><br />RA then cuts to his transformed toy, but it is clear he was unable to wrap his head around actually transforming this childrens toy, as it is very rickety. At 2:25 we get a glimpse into RA's depression, as he plays with his new toy while talking about drinking alone.<br /><br />We are then treated to 3 full minutes of RA unsucsessfully trying to transform this toy to "robot mode", however it becomes painfully clear that his clumsy meatmitts are not up to this test of dexterity. He manages to partially transform Grievous, while breaking off 2 legs in the process. He fumbles with the thing for what seems like forever, when he has to take a break for a "pee pee". Apparently editing never entered this equation.<br /><br />He comes back refreshed and ready for a new crack at the impossible task, unfortunatly it becomes clear that its just not happening for him, and after 2 more minutes of fumbling with it, he cuts to a fully transformed figure. I am willing to bet he sought the help of a neighbor child to complete the task, because as soon as he touches the thing again he begins to break pieces off.<br /><br />Overall I found this review very entertaining, Robot Adventure took me for a ride through a wide array of emotions, I felt his frustration, his excitement, his embarassment, and his weak bladder, as he played with, and was ultimatly disappointed by, his new action figure. This video gives us a peek into the broken soul, and a disturbed young man crying out for help. 5 out of 5<br /><br />Next up "Jeepers Media" (or Creepers media, as I will be referring to him) with one of his "naughty videos". Brace yourselves, this one is a doozy.<br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/R9YxYRJhoAQ&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/R9YxYRJhoAQ&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed><a class="cunjcsskuazjrffgxubb" href="http://www.youtube.com/v/R9YxYRJhoAQ&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0"></a></object><br /><br />To give a brief summary, Creepers videos, or at least his naughty ones, seem to revolve around an eccentric middleaged man, applying his twisted sense or reality to Disney toys made for very young children. I will leave it to the reader to interpret this further, I however will say that I find this overall very disturbing.<br /><br />Now there are some understandable reasons for a grown man to collect action figures, its not my bag., but who am I to judge. However I will judge a grown man who collects toys aimed at toddlers. There is something very strange about this, and you may wonder what kind of man not only collects these toys, but makes video reviews of them. After experiencing just 10 seconds of this video you will agree, Mike Mozart is EXACTLY that kind of man. Imagine if you will, a blubbering man child let loose in one of those dirty joke stores in the mall. Only the dirty joke store is actually the young children section of the toy store.<br /><br />This idiot cackles through this review, as he applies his warped sense of humor to various toys, all interacting with the gem of his collection, the talking/fingering Pluto figure. Mozart has the sense of discovery of a 12 year old with his first boner. This collection of videos should have this man on several police "watch lists". The combination of a twisted sense of humor, toys aimed at a very young audience, and Mozart's near orgasmic joy over the whole thing are deeply upsetting. <br /><br />I am going to give this review 1 out of 5 stars (that is the lowest Youtube allows) However I also went ahead and reported his video to Youtube, even though it doesn't break any specific rules, I think he is someone who should be closely watched. His next review might just be of a young boys anus.MikeCulhanehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10723389076472212949noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-56152120222753792442010-01-26T19:33:00.004-05:002010-01-26T19:36:15.909-05:00American Psycho<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3qsb7Wr50Axxz57Yfbw71mX7Ha0u33lW12muib615MGpBM1T-bvE9O48GwkrAE7tj4HPlEoIDNjjCoFucKZ3XfJXYoVzYjBgHSqXCMPas3mfJvmATbgmkzvBnCrpVF8_ErT1unI6dbeSe/s1600-h/bateCarl.jpg"><br /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYBIAtNZHVzx6sDFShRgpz7oqyfph7_sFMvPnM5YPCqfhCN6yrRGti8DR6J_2-SeGzg90Zgb2D8u-rnIUKFOoGP5Sj6T_J4sYvrTUVhg-w58dNQDLLsJveGNfmUhjBsQT0SWjtN7kcQUWD/s1600-h/Bateman.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 338px; height: 308px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYBIAtNZHVzx6sDFShRgpz7oqyfph7_sFMvPnM5YPCqfhCN6yrRGti8DR6J_2-SeGzg90Zgb2D8u-rnIUKFOoGP5Sj6T_J4sYvrTUVhg-w58dNQDLLsJveGNfmUhjBsQT0SWjtN7kcQUWD/s400/Bateman.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5431211430023658114" border="0" /></a><br />one of the best movies I've ever seen is American Psycho<br />and I'll tell you why right now.... (Let me just crank up my Coolio first though)<br />Aw ye, I'm mad trippin' homie<br />A) it stars Christian baleB) He runs around naked in white sneakers<br />C) He kills hookers and doesn't afraid of anything<br />D) He has yuppie friends<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3qsb7Wr50Axxz57Yfbw71mX7Ha0u33lW12muib615MGpBM1T-bvE9O48GwkrAE7tj4HPlEoIDNjjCoFucKZ3XfJXYoVzYjBgHSqXCMPas3mfJvmATbgmkzvBnCrpVF8_ErT1unI6dbeSe/s1600-h/bateCarl.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 252px; height: 252px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3qsb7Wr50Axxz57Yfbw71mX7Ha0u33lW12muib615MGpBM1T-bvE9O48GwkrAE7tj4HPlEoIDNjjCoFucKZ3XfJXYoVzYjBgHSqXCMPas3mfJvmATbgmkzvBnCrpVF8_ErT1unI6dbeSe/s400/bateCarl.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5431211757464467298" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Do you like Tom Jones, Will?<br /></span></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBHfuOKo2IBP5wc8-OIFKqJxUW7tcIIR_kLdEXzIhXzpKvmUB7qP12tx2ZRwyE5hmpTtyaZjRt4L7zyawy6ebUFah13Dyb2DzBGEchuZO-CplYJWU4BsFzpQNskDIfX4wB4r8ilX8rxlkj/s1600-h/Bale+Dou+Bou.jpg"><br /></a>First off the story is about badass Patrick Bateman just kicking so much fucking ass.. living life to the fullest, doing drugs, and dancing to 80's music with his group of eccentric buddies! This of course is when the shit hits the ceiling. Patrick Bateman slowly starts to lose his goddamn mind and suddenly goes Haywire. His mind almost explodes into a pile of hay, like hulk Hogan eating a bacon sandwich with mustard and pickles. Actually if we had to pin point when Bateman goes crazy, I think I'd say it was seeing a business card better than his. Yes that of course is a very good reason to lose your mind. For example, my friend had a better haircut than me last week, and I cried for a solid week, unable to eat, and living in a pile of urine soaked soaks for weeks. So anyways the Batman loses his shit and starts to kill hookers without discretion, telling them they aren't as powerful as the Batman, and need to be destroyed from the planet. So he kills hookers for 45mins, running around in white sneakers. After a while he gets super depressed after realizing his insane killing spree was for nothing, because he had dreamed the whole thing up. Patrick Bat-man laughs hysterically, and suddenly realizes he has home economics class in 20mins,and grabs his backpack, and juice box and runs off to play in the summer day.<br /><br />I'd have to say its the best movie ever made, and highly urge everyone to see this beast of a movie. The amount of high fives going off in your private theatre after watching this movie will be insane. It will be like 30 sonic booms, and 20 747's taking off at once. Your mom will respect you for once in your life, and I'm sure you'll reach Nirvana.<br /><br />Don't take my word for it though, just go out and buy yourself a ticket to see American Psycho and see for yourself, your grandma won't be disappointed.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBHfuOKo2IBP5wc8-OIFKqJxUW7tcIIR_kLdEXzIhXzpKvmUB7qP12tx2ZRwyE5hmpTtyaZjRt4L7zyawy6ebUFah13Dyb2DzBGEchuZO-CplYJWU4BsFzpQNskDIfX4wB4r8ilX8rxlkj/s1600-h/Bale+Dou+Bou.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 305px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBHfuOKo2IBP5wc8-OIFKqJxUW7tcIIR_kLdEXzIhXzpKvmUB7qP12tx2ZRwyE5hmpTtyaZjRt4L7zyawy6ebUFah13Dyb2DzBGEchuZO-CplYJWU4BsFzpQNskDIfX4wB4r8ilX8rxlkj/s400/Bale+Dou+Bou.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5431211525184491890" border="0" /></a>Champskiezhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09946285321461982637noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-23238617151547974652010-01-18T10:33:00.007-05:002010-01-22T10:25:26.274-05:00Local Heroes: $1.85 GuyEvery town has their own group of eccentric weirdos that everyone in town knows one way or another.<br />My hometown Guelph, Ontario is no different. We have people that just scream obscenities at others as they get on the bus, kids that hang around the downtown fountain harassing people for spare change and my personal favourite: $1.85 guy.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_LgZ93bUTYqk/S1eTL6KE25I/AAAAAAAAAFQ/YeE-B9ejj0U/s1600-h/mainpic1.85.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_LgZ93bUTYqk/S1eTL6KE25I/AAAAAAAAAFQ/YeE-B9ejj0U/s320/mainpic1.85.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5428969708617784210" /></a><br /><br />For those not in the know $1.85 Guy is a character that hangs out mostly around downtown Guelph, between Carden St. and St. George square. <br /><br />He is usually seen with long hair, a mustache, bucket hat, boxer shorts and a stolen bicycle.<br />He generally approaches his marks on the stolen bike and proceeds to ask them: "excuse me, can you spare some change? I happen to be short a $1.85?"<br /><br />A few questions immediately arise from this.<br /><br />- Why exactly a $1.85? How did he come to this number?<br />I have a few theories: This was the price of the bus, like ten years ago. He could also be hoping to get two dollars.<br /><br />- Why does he need $1.85?<br />Well it isn't for bus fare because he usually has a stolen bike with him. I think this motivational poster of him found on facebook best describes his motives.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_LgZ93bUTYqk/S1jKl8ZIeaI/AAAAAAAAAFY/FgfXnQU1Qxk/s1600-h/n679760152_5651807_7350.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 256px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_LgZ93bUTYqk/S1jKl8ZIeaI/AAAAAAAAAFY/FgfXnQU1Qxk/s320/n679760152_5651807_7350.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5429312104010643874" /></a><br /><br />So that's his mission objective in brief.<br /><br />If I could say one thing that's positive about $1.85 guy is that he is very polite about asking for a $1.85.<br /><br />I was hoping to have an interview with $1.85 guy for this post, but he hasn't been seen around downtown Guelph in awhile. <br />So that is my goal for this coming year. Interview the man and find out what makes him tick.<br /><br />His infamy knows no bounds! It seems you can now become a fan of him on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/pages/Dollar-85-Guy/182439219095?ref=sgm#/pages/Dollar-85-Guy/182439219095?v=wall&ref=sgm">Facebook</a>.<br /><br />If you would like to know more about $1.85 guy, there is an article about him getting arrested a few summers ago and accidentally let out in the <a href="http://news.guelphmercury.com/article/401781">Guelph Mercury</a>.Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06801486208120179826noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-6478043766111226802010-01-17T18:00:00.006-05:002010-01-17T20:01:23.765-05:00Why do Microphones look So much like Penises??!?<span style="font-size:100%;">So I'm sitting here, avoiding homework and watching live performances on youtube, and all at once it slaps me across the face like something appropriately phallic. Since my giggling teenage years I have known that microphones looked just like dicks, but I never really stopped to wonder why.</span><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhm2wuUAFye3VKFBKoB_E1Bu09RshquegZQV5Bgq04ndC_wSLyZ1u5HR6GBLGwyGvYbfa_3uEfUXs1kRF6RpOqPPK8LMqvk10y2zlmJIxHQ0lEptfaUeGoL5BKd8mQuzRjmH0dWfyZvutEV/s1600-h/36622-WirelessMicrophone.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 290px; height: 290px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhm2wuUAFye3VKFBKoB_E1Bu09RshquegZQV5Bgq04ndC_wSLyZ1u5HR6GBLGwyGvYbfa_3uEfUXs1kRF6RpOqPPK8LMqvk10y2zlmJIxHQ0lEptfaUeGoL5BKd8mQuzRjmH0dWfyZvutEV/s320/36622-WirelessMicrophone.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5427849567410015106" border="0" /></a> <span style="font-style: italic;">Basically a dick<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I always just thought it was one of those things, you know, accepted it as "that's how microphones look". And of course, they didn't always look like dongs, <a href="http://www.lloydmicrophoneclassics.com/mic_history.html">in fact they used to look much different</a>. With all the advancements in technology over the last 20 years, why are microphones still roughly the same size and shape of a gristle missile? It seems either the work of some master prankster, pulling a fast one on the entire music industry, or a pervert savant who wanted the option to get off to images and videos of any singer ever, using limited imagination.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnHzsxXCE2M-PnTuj3lljzoVETIFmVptl9EbaXUrx37dpQvLexvX6kWkzZYYJwk_RcQ_32qqHPrwE_fojAOiEm1mgGbvTWyo8GJ5585x2MTz6LWvt6iwFP2Vmaw_IAcg9tA1v67lckwLyV/s1600-h/dicks.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 316px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnHzsxXCE2M-PnTuj3lljzoVETIFmVptl9EbaXUrx37dpQvLexvX6kWkzZYYJwk_RcQ_32qqHPrwE_fojAOiEm1mgGbvTWyo8GJ5585x2MTz6LWvt6iwFP2Vmaw_IAcg9tA1v67lckwLyV/s320/dicks.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5427873779495299282" border="0" /></a><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">Lets play, spot the fellatio</span><br /></div><br /><br />I mean, look at the above picture! Only the shape of the microphone (or penis) is censored, and you are hard pressed to figure out which is an act or oral majesty, and which is singing. A quick google search of "why are microphones phallic" yields many results, however not one of them explains the penile design. If a long shaft, with a bulbous head was the perfect instrument for sound recognition, why cant I hear out of my dick? And why don't we have dicks for ears? I suppose it is much to late for a change, the microphone is an immediately recognizable symbol of music, and any attempt to change it would elicit passionate outcry frm music fans and pedophiles alike.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGGIinx-umpcwshlxm9FsxjdIVy-LpuoxHs9ftR_PCOcqU3pnxANM8c9kyS6HbXTQBACko99R15_hWrtpwTcX-_9KKi3v3upuLCwNKsWYDEXFRUfZKV4h8gAZ8yRiNHjwEiL0pjNEkisvm/s1600-h/0401-miley-cyrus-holding-mic_lg.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 246px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGGIinx-umpcwshlxm9FsxjdIVy-LpuoxHs9ftR_PCOcqU3pnxANM8c9kyS6HbXTQBACko99R15_hWrtpwTcX-_9KKi3v3upuLCwNKsWYDEXFRUfZKV4h8gAZ8yRiNHjwEiL0pjNEkisvm/s320/0401-miley-cyrus-holding-mic_lg.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5427878506847147634" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;"></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"></span></span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;"></span></div></div>MikeCulhanehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10723389076472212949noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-13814001902637909192010-01-13T15:32:00.007-05:002010-01-13T23:53:52.977-05:00Finland and Racism<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://wwp.greenwichmeantime.com/images/europe/finland.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 418px; height: 327px;" src="http://wwp.greenwichmeantime.com/images/europe/finland.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br />I had a few friends go to Finland on vacation this past summer to mostly drink and to go to some concerts. <br />I asked them to bring back something cheap, weird and Finish. <br />Well they delivered...<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2256/1712100291_d3813517d2.jpg?v=0"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 375px; height: 500px;" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2256/1712100291_d3813517d2.jpg?v=0" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br />What the hell...<br /><br />He's name is Petter-Peli. Which apparently means Black Peter and he is Finland's answer to Old Maid. But instead of a crotchety old woman you don't want to end up with, you get stuck with an old racist stereotype. <br /><br />Here is a desciption of the game:<br />"Pekka-Peli is a game apart. Not only is it a game without winners -- the goal of the game is to not become the loser, Pekka-Peli.<br /><br />Looks like Pekka-Peli has been labeled as an outcast and a loser by Finnish society. Sounds racist enough to me.<br /><br />Here are some of the "non-losers" that are included in the game:<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_LgZ93bUTYqk/S06iP0XQ2TI/AAAAAAAAAEY/Pb65O5Xe93M/s1600-h/scan0001.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 212px; height: 320px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_LgZ93bUTYqk/S06iP0XQ2TI/AAAAAAAAAEY/Pb65O5Xe93M/s320/scan0001.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5426452993665980722" /></a><br /><br /><br />Not only are all the characters really white, they get to do cool stuff like: be an old miser, drive a race car, cut the legs off of someone's suit and grab a cat by the tail. <br /><br />Poor old pete is left to smoke a cigarette out in the cold in some stupid hat.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_LgZ93bUTYqk/S06ibciExkI/AAAAAAAAAEg/nnGDSHdQAao/s1600-h/scan0002.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 182px; height: 320px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_LgZ93bUTYqk/S06ibciExkI/AAAAAAAAAEg/nnGDSHdQAao/s320/scan0002.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5426453193427306050" /></a>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06801486208120179826noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-71372953650903787062010-01-12T18:24:00.002-05:002010-01-13T12:19:23.174-05:00Family follies<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilPi5oStpET-hvFgN_-HPjhZzFd6sfWVhL-osg-TKgJSMMDxRXGwzb_phyXp-27bOgQt3vaokyOzcylJRUDaEyyUwf3OcMMqd6g6cjj3KwDk8zEFSUdtKHL4Xj8gsIRMiU4PYXeJO1gmjW/s1600-h/HandicapDad.jpg"><meta equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" 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mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--></a><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";font-size:11pt;" ><span><span>Ahhh families, we've all got them, we all love them (<span style="font-style: italic;">Even if you see grandma orally pleasuring grandpa on the dining room table</span>) and although that might be a reason to perhaps move to Zihuatanejo, you just gotta bare and grin what momma birthed you into! Now every once in a while we see some families that are just most interesting to observe than others, like
<br />maybe old poppa is an accountant, and dear old mommy is a convict and that of course makes for a hilarious family picture! (<span style="font-style: italic;">Yes I'm going somewhere with this story!</span>)
<br />Family pictures usually catch a tender moment in where a family "Shows ya what they got" a hurrah of genes fruitfully dancing on camera. Now if my family pictures were to be discussed on this blog, you'd raise numerous questions "Did mom kill dad?" "Why does your mom look hungry?" "Why is your sister's forehead causing a lens flare?" So I'm not going to talk about my pictures (<span style="font-style: italic;">Those are for my therapist to judge</span>) Instead I'm going to mock other people to make myself feel better and hopefully provide some boner inducing laughter in all 3 readers of this blog, so hold on to yer' lug nuts, it's time for an over haul!
<br />
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font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--></a><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";font-size:11pt;" >Teeth! This picture makes me believe that some kind of Neanderthal somehow stowed himself away in Marty Mcfly's trunk and arrived sometime around the 1980's. He seems to have married a woman who has eaten nothing but old twigs, and dried rabbit pellets and who eventually tricked into stealing him a meal fit for a man of his appetite. I do feel sorry for that delicious baby, but in the end, he does have the coolest parents on the block. I mean, who else can teach their son to hunt, and skin a deer like a cave dad? (<span style="font-style: italic;">note: I do believe Adam carolla could do that as well</span>)
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font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";font-size:11pt;" >DERP! A lizard walks amongst us ladies and gentlemen! I can only explain this picture through my simple, simple understanding of radiation. So here goes. If a lizard and bob barker somehow slipped and landed in a pile of radioactive goo, the genes and cells of both parties would be meshed together at such a rapid speed, you'd think you witness sex between Dustin Diamond and that old lady from that show "227" Although you'd think bob barker would then be left with cool super powers, you're WRONG! You're only left with a man who can view insects with his big ol' bubbly eyes and ends up marrying a fairly wealthy debutant. I think the perk is his extremely long, and powerful tongue, which can pleasure you anywhere, at any time, so next time I feel a tickling in my anus, I'll just nod and smile. (<span style="font-style: italic;">call me Liz-a-maxims, please?</span>)
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font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";font-size:11pt;" >"<span style="font-style: italic;">LOL, it's your fault Dad and I touch penises every night mom! You silly, silly woman you!</span>" I fail to understand why anyone would take this photo and actually keep it in their family album. I mean, once mom turns up missing, the police are going to inspect the house, and find blue prints of the torture room you built to house her, shovels, ice picks (The murder weapons) and finally a picture tagged up to a cork-board that has "<span style="font-style: italic;">Kill mother dearest</span>" written in goats blood (cause I know when I want to curse my enemies only goat's blood will suffice. Goats are evil and so is their milk) So keeping this picture only shows the hate you have for a woman that forced you to watch her do aerobics in front of the TV, while listening to "Girls just wanna have fun". Oh and it also shows that your sister is the ring leader, judging by the evil incantations she's casting from her eyeballs.</span>
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font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--></a><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";font-size:11pt;" >Being cool is not something you can just walk into, it's something you are at birth, when you shoot out of a small opening, and frantically swim your way to the egg, you're already sporting a square top haircut, and a leather jacket with a cool gang name sewed into it. That's what this cool cat is all about (<span style="font-style: italic;">see me fail at being cool? I swam out with my name sewn into my tighty whitties</span>) I can only imagine the glorious days <span style="font-style: italic;">Barteque koomadias</span> (that's Koo-ma-die-is) spent rocking out in the garage, singing along to Poison and Skidrow, dreaming of the time he could finally unleash his beautiful ballad voice without his dad breaking his HB pencil. I mean, just look at his sorry family! I'm fairly certain all his brother's wet their pants and sing to Beach boys while Koomadias sits in a corner giving himself his first tattoo using a homemade tattoo gun which he fashioned out of a Flintstones pen which he received out of a box of Fruity Pebbles. (<span style="font-style: italic;">man..what a cool kid</span>)
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font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";font-size:11pt;" >Damn you Jimmy Fallon! DAMN YOU TO HELL!! Have you ever wondered why Jimmy fallon ruins every single SNL skit with his childish composure? Or perhaps even wondered why he can never keep a straight face, even when he's talking about the mass murder of orphans infected with aids? Well neither can I, but this Jimmy fallon lookalike dad certainly seems to explain why anyone that looks like Jimmy fallon can't be trusted around anything as precious as a baby. Here's how I believe the scenario would go:
<br /><span style=""> </span>(Guy) "<span style="font-style: italic;">hey Jimmy, check out my new baby, he's so shiny and new</span>"
<br />(Fallon) "<span style="font-style: italic;">Oh can I hold him? He's so tiny, and smells like a new car..(slowly begins to lose composure) he's like a car, that was made..like Ford just rolled him out of the assembly line (Slowly begins to crush tiny windpipe) like, like, he's like he's never been driven before..(rubs babies unconscious body against rough facial hair) Oh no, the new car is leaking, that's not at all like a new car" (throws baby out window)</span></span>
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<br />(and just like Jimmy fallon i failed to cause any laughter... oh the misery in my life..wait, that's funny)
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<br />Champskiezhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09946285321461982637noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-64476830383631581212010-01-11T17:26:00.002-05:002010-01-11T17:29:57.590-05:00Farewell 2009Not sure how old this is, obviously its no more then a month, but the internet measures time at an accelerated rate, so for all I know my grandmother could be screaming "OLD" as I type this. Nevertheless it is quite clever, and very cool.<br /><br /><object width="560" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/eKYe1KiwywE&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/eKYe1KiwywE&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object>MikeCulhanehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10723389076472212949noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-61089470341770209952010-01-10T13:43:00.000-05:002010-01-10T17:21:18.704-05:00Where has the magic gone?I grew up at the perfect time to be a wrestling fan. Much to my fathers chagrin I would spend my Saturday mornings faithfully glued to the TV, watching musclebound men in tiny speedos grapple and pin one another. But it wasn't all about the actual fighting, and to my fathers relief, not about the near naked musclemen (though their physiques played an important role). The story lines, gimmicks, and persona's were aimed directly at a young child (at ME). What you were watching was a close as you were going to get to real life superheros and villains. Some even had supposed super powers, the Undertaker was an undead monster, Papa Shango was a witch doctor, Hulk Hogan had super strength and The Ultimate Warrior was a friggin maniac.<br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/laiZgrIpbcA&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/laiZgrIpbcA&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed><a class="xsxoleypurtrttbnxbwh" href="http://www.youtube.com/v/laiZgrIpbcA&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0"></a></object><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><div style="text-align: left;">For a boy who loved comic books, and action figures, this was literally the greatest thing ever. The story lines were so fantastical, and the characters so epic, and yet real, that it made for the very best hour of television. There was something special during this time that has been completely lost today. <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuh7he8Odn91JMFKBUavGh7muWP4qJcHiQB2WsfnAdt350OkuRd306REoZC1zQMYEKdMR5dLtTvJZceNVVkKSjAS5WVQTTQ8vVH2Qdcs2GhXL1QMwoNgLBZVHzU2125G4HfFDlnJc8mmLO/s1600-h/hogan.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 240px; height: 270px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuh7he8Odn91JMFKBUavGh7muWP4qJcHiQB2WsfnAdt350OkuRd306REoZC1zQMYEKdMR5dLtTvJZceNVVkKSjAS5WVQTTQ8vVH2Qdcs2GhXL1QMwoNgLBZVHzU2125G4HfFDlnJc8mmLO/s320/hogan.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5425186853496739858" border="0" /></a><br /></div><span style="font-style: italic;">"special"</span></div><br />One could say that wrestling actually grew up along with my generation. So instead of catering to a child demographic, professional wrestling now caters to legions of grown children, Men (and women) who still buy into this shit, and have forced wrestling to evolve into the cluster fuck that it is today. Instead of having cool inventive gimmicks and persona's, aimed at children, wrestlers today have lame realistic gimmicks seemingly aimed at grown men (and women). Somewhere around the late 90's, wrestleing changed from naive entertainment aimed at a young audience, to a redneck soap opera, with the kind of imaginative characters who wouldn't look out of place, head down at a bar, complaining about their job. Characters ranging from Biker, to Rapper, to uh.. er.. tough dude.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_rqMOydTcCENBKfOfKXJY5k_6bBO3E5xheBKTPhY2OxGKfjWVgqBDeanmtn8eaLmICr-_6ETGCqYZelffMbTEwXNoJVSAYaMbs6k2RwLEylzY70qVEbJT8FRVgm5pZ0jNvt9k1LGxIB1Q/s1600-h/batista-11893.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 214px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_rqMOydTcCENBKfOfKXJY5k_6bBO3E5xheBKTPhY2OxGKfjWVgqBDeanmtn8eaLmICr-_6ETGCqYZelffMbTEwXNoJVSAYaMbs6k2RwLEylzY70qVEbJT8FRVgm5pZ0jNvt9k1LGxIB1Q/s320/batista-11893.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5425228070287672738" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">pretty tough<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: left;">That's not to say that these types of characters didn't exist before, Razor Ramone was by far my favorite wrestler, and he more or less played a tough dude. However his character was unique at the time, still had style and fit in perfectly, maybe it was simply because he was the only "anti hero" at the time? He was also funny, and entertaining, and didn't take himself too seriously, I eman looking back, his character was a bit ridiculious, but such were the times. Today the roster is flooded with characters who are more or less simply tough dudes, and they all have some very serious personal issues. I'm not talking being a womanizing machizmo eater, or a walking dead, but fabricated personal lives which reflect the problems of their adult viewrs. A child certainly doesn't get into a storyline focased on cheating wives and sexually transmitted diseases the way they would say, pumping up a hulk out comeback, with their collective cheers.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5l23cy_Xz-YcrSgghSRZfCOrNWI39i0d21yK9b0ssvKg0R5f-AgnIL52DP3LqumBj4vOXGgU2QrNgk35SwExn4lFMPO84GCxlyG3gyRLX64H-4z_SF_qtYXl-GLpDR_GJMQtAaZ5mD9zd/s1600-h/razor.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 230px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5l23cy_Xz-YcrSgghSRZfCOrNWI39i0d21yK9b0ssvKg0R5f-AgnIL52DP3LqumBj4vOXGgU2QrNgk35SwExn4lFMPO84GCxlyG3gyRLX64H-4z_SF_qtYXl-GLpDR_GJMQtAaZ5mD9zd/s320/razor.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5425234587828446130" border="0" /></a><span style="font-style: italic;">the best the best</span><br /></div><br /><br />I know this was all fostered in during the "attitude era", when the WWE realized it could make oodles of money by playing to the secret desires of its audience ie: having a redneck tell off his boss night after night. But this shtick is more worn out then a hookers knees, and it all but destroyed the WWE of my day. It traded in hero's for anti heroes, clever one liners for cursing, and a naive homo eroticism that we all could laugh at, for ball flexing testosterone. Like most things, wrestling has been ruined by greed, broadening its audience while all but forgetting the fun in what it used to be.<br /><span style="font-style: italic;"></span></div></div>MikeCulhanehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10723389076472212949noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-71695599229983623542010-01-09T09:15:00.002-05:002010-01-10T19:21:01.506-05:00Van Damme - A man among boys<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://www.movie-holic.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/bloodsport.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 384px; height: 288px;" src="http://www.movie-holic.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/bloodsport.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br />I've always felt that Jean-Claude Van Damme never got the credit that he deserved during the action movie boom of the late 80's and early 90's.<br /><br />He seemed to always be out ranked by Stallone, Schwarzenegger, Willis and even Mel Gibson. <br /><br />Van Damme should not be counted out of that group. He has an ace up his sleeve that he tries to break out in every movie.<br /><br />The kicks and splits.<br /><br />Exhibit A:<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/wci3KlrF1cc&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/wci3KlrF1cc&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />Did you see all that?<br /><br />Check out how awesome those kicks and splits are.<br /><br />Round housing a guy into live wires, kicking Raul Julia as M. Bison in the face, and doing the splits between two tables well kicking his opponents ass.<br /><br />Jean Claude Van Damme can do it all.<br /><br />One of his other tactics in movies is to often team up with some form of himself.<br /><br />- Double Impact: Van Damme plays twin brothers separated at birth and raised in different countries.<br /><br />-Timecop: Van Damme plays two versions of the same character overlapping in space-time continuum.<br /><br />- Maxium Risk: Van Damme plays twin brothers separated at birth, one of which was murdered.<br /><br />- The Order: Van Damme plays two different characters in different eras.<br /><br />- The Replicant: Van Damme plays a serial killer and his futuristic clone and mafioso rockstar Repli Gotti.<br /><br />You'd think with a combination of amazing kicks and splits with the ability to team up with yourself would make JCVD unstoppable. <br /><br />No. Our hero Jean Claude Van Damme suffered the same fate as many action starts from the era and was unable to get work.<br /><br />Don't count him out yet.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_LgZ93bUTYqk/S0kMY4M05II/AAAAAAAAADc/RzO62h1QKLQ/s1600-h/jcvd.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 233px; height: 320px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_LgZ93bUTYqk/S0kMY4M05II/AAAAAAAAADc/RzO62h1QKLQ/s320/jcvd.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5424880847687050370" /></a><br /><br />Jean Claude Van Damme is back in the appropriately titled JCVD. In Van Damme's latest film he plays a fictionalized version of himself where he is and out of work actor whose career and life are falling apart and has to become a hero for some hostages in a post office.<br /><br />Here is the trailer:<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/4z_6UfkQ-c0&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/4z_6UfkQ-c0&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>Jordanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06801486208120179826noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-36063228310274661282010-01-08T17:44:00.000-05:002010-01-09T12:06:04.045-05:00Goddamn kids these days<meta equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" 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mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--> <p class="MsoNormal">I have seen some things on my time here on earth, The fall of communism, the increase and decrease of Oprah windfrys waist line, and Mr.T cereal, and although that seems like more than enough things to die a happy man I can safely say "No! It's not enough!". I say this because even though I have seen terrible things, the worst would have to be witnessing the rise of teenage girls, and their awkward generation.
<br />Sure we've all encountered the random 16 year old girl behind the counter at Burger King, while buying our disgusting testicle shrinking burgers, and their fuzzy, fizzy, rat urine tasting drinks. Sure here you might get some awkward stares, and perhaps the inability to function but ohhhh oh oh oh.. let me tell you,<span style=""> </span>on the internet they are a force to be reckoned with my sweet, sweet child.</p> <div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div><p style="text-align: center;" class="MsoNormal"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyABJrqeqcjQRqtcIqi1lW2GIxh3iCG4ZsI_DbId9knnHDZWAlVOo2v7ErInDLR2nOQ8KDKQvAK7Gys5wjc3ZQCA2OwV6s_9U8ayZwrZ5735JCzZ-prauHJd8F0hlH7e3AZiKfC0u58NTu/s1600-h/Tabby.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 241px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyABJrqeqcjQRqtcIqi1lW2GIxh3iCG4ZsI_DbId9knnHDZWAlVOo2v7ErInDLR2nOQ8KDKQvAK7Gys5wjc3ZQCA2OwV6s_9U8ayZwrZ5735JCzZ-prauHJd8F0hlH7e3AZiKfC0u58NTu/s320/Tabby.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5424504153292167554" border="0" /></a><span style="font-style: italic;">Camwhore is her</span></p><p style="text-align: left;" class="MsoNormal"><meta equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" content="Word.Document"><meta 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mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--> </p><p class="MsoNormal">For all the unsavy users of computers or perhaps people who in search of the Beatrice Arthur memorial page ended up on this blog site, let me fill you in on what a camwhore is.
<br />
<br /><b style="">Whore </b><span class="prondelim">[hawr, hohr or, often, hoo r]</span><span class="prondelim">
<br /></span><i style="">–noun<o:p></o:p></i></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><i style=""><span style=""> </span>a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse, usually for money; prostitute; harlot; strumpet.<o:p></o:p></i></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b style="">Camera </b><span class="prondelim"><span style="display: none;">/</span></span><span class="pron"><span style="display: none;">ˈkæm</span></span><span style="display: none;"><!--[if gte vml 1]><v:shape id="Picture_x0020_3" spid="_x0000_i1028" type="#_x0000_t75" alt="http://sp.ask.com/dictstatic/dictionary/graphics/luna/thinsp.png" style="'width:1.8pt;height:3pt;visibility:visible;mso-wrap-style:square'"> <v:imagedata src="file:///C:\Users\Castaner\AppData\Local\Temp\msohtmlclip1\01\clip_image001.png" title="thinsp"> </v:shape><![endif]--><!--[if !vml]--><img src="file:///C:/Users/Castaner/AppData/Local/Temp/msohtmlclip1/01/clip_image002.gif" alt="http://sp.ask.com/dictstatic/dictionary/graphics/luna/thinsp.png" shapes="Picture_x0020_3" width="2" height="4" /><!--[endif]--></span><span class="pron"><span style="display: none;">ər</span></span><span style="display: none;"><!--[if gte vml 1]><v:shape id="Picture_x0020_4" spid="_x0000_i1027" type="#_x0000_t75" alt="http://sp.ask.com/dictstatic/dictionary/graphics/luna/thinsp.png" style="'width:1.8pt;height:3pt;visibility:visible;mso-wrap-style:square'"> <v:imagedata src="file:///C:\Users\Castaner\AppData\Local\Temp\msohtmlclip1\01\clip_image001.png" title="thinsp"> </v:shape><![endif]--><!--[if !vml]--><img src="file:///C:/Users/Castaner/AppData/Local/Temp/msohtmlclip1/01/clip_image002.gif" alt="http://sp.ask.com/dictstatic/dictionary/graphics/luna/thinsp.png" shapes="Picture_x0020_4" width="2" height="4" /><!--[endif]--></span><span class="pron"><span style="display: none;">ə,</span></span><span class="showipapr"><span style="display: none;"> </span></span><span class="pron"><span style="display: none;">ˈkæm</span></span><span style="display: none;"><!--[if gte vml 1]><v:shape id="Picture_x0020_5" spid="_x0000_i1026" type="#_x0000_t75" alt="http://sp.ask.com/dictstatic/dictionary/graphics/luna/thinsp.png" style="'width:1.8pt;height:3pt;visibility:visible;mso-wrap-style:square'"> <v:imagedata src="file:///C:\Users\Castaner\AppData\Local\Temp\msohtmlclip1\01\clip_image001.png" title="thinsp"> </v:shape><![endif]--><!--[if !vml]--><img src="file:///C:/Users/Castaner/AppData/Local/Temp/msohtmlclip1/01/clip_image002.gif" alt="http://sp.ask.com/dictstatic/dictionary/graphics/luna/thinsp.png" shapes="Picture_x0020_5" width="2" height="4" /><!--[endif]--></span><span class="pron"><span style="display: none;">rə</span></span><span class="prondelim"><span style="display: none;">/</span></span><span class="showipapr"><span style="display: none;"> </span></span><a href="http://dictionary.reference.com/help/luna/IPA_pron_key.html" target="_blank"><span style="display: none; text-decoration: none;color:blue;" ><!--[if gte vml 1]><v:shape id="Picture_x0020_6" spid="_x0000_i1025" type="#_x0000_t75" alt="http://sp.ask.com/dictstatic/g/d/dictionary_questionbutton_default.gif" href="http://dictionary.reference.com/help/luna/IPA_pron_key.html" target=""_blank"" style="'width:11.4pt;height:11.4pt;visibility:visible;" button="t"> <v:imagedata src="file:///C:\Users\Castaner\AppData\Local\Temp\msohtmlclip1\01\clip_image003.gif" title="dictionary_questionbutton_default"> </v:shape><![endif]--><!--[if !vml]--><span style=""><img src="file:///C:/Users/Castaner/AppData/Local/Temp/msohtmlclip1/01/clip_image003.gif" alt="http://sp.ask.com/dictstatic/g/d/dictionary_questionbutton_default.gif" shapes="Picture_x0020_6" width="15" border="0" height="15" /></span><!--[endif]--></span></a><span class="prondelim">[</span><span class="boldface">kam</span><span class="pron">-er-</span><span class="ital-inline">uh</span><span class="pron">,</span><span class="showspellpr"> </span><span class="boldface">kam</span><span class="pron">-r</span><span class="ital-inline">uh</span><span class="prondelim">]
<br /></span>–noun
<br /><span style=""> </span><i style="">a boxlike device for holding a film or plate sensitive to light, having an aperture controlled by a shutter that, when opened, admits light enabling an object to be focused, usually by means of a lens, on the film or plate, thereby producing a photographic image.<o:p></o:p></i></p> <p></p><p style="text-align: left;" class="MsoNormal"><meta equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" content="Word.Document"><meta name="Generator" content="Microsoft Word 12"><meta name="Originator" content="Microsoft Word 12"><link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CCastaner%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><link rel="themeData" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CCastaner%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_themedata.thmx"><link rel="colorSchemeMapping" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CCastaner%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_colorschememapping.xml"><!--[if gte mso 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src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVe5EYBUXp8AykJQdFZ33o9FqBqaAhclzxOgTYfAlvBQuf4ZPa6aIiC0gtL7SgN6HzwcRpJgCyNZWhOQb7bEigutUe1XAlzOy4EnNwWXp-7DplThUJGJOxPLWSA9hHZ70txORlDxG9SOqh/s320/DolphinMarriage.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5424516935887677954" border="0" /></a><span style="font-style: italic;">"Zeus and Roxanne" makes me cackle like and old lesbian</span></p><p style="text-align: left;" class="MsoNormal"><meta equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" content="Word.Document"><meta name="Generator" content="Microsoft Word 12"><meta name="Originator" content="Microsoft Word 12"><link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CCastaner%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><link rel="themeData" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CCastaner%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_themedata.thmx"><link rel="colorSchemeMapping" 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Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";font-size:130%;" >Anyways, these strumpets (as I like to call them) take up the precious resources offered by the internets, and hog them</span><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";font-size:130%;" > for their</span><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";font-size:130%;" > own selfish purposes to make themselves feel greatly superior to us lowly adults, what with our wrinkly skin, and frazzled pubic hair..they just make me so unhappy. 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font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} </style> <![endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";font-size:130%;" >It's almost as if these girls have been able to turn water into wine using our primitive technology, and instead of reading the instructions that come in the box like all of us simpletons do, they've deciphered a secret code, possibly written by the hard working underpaid Asian workers, and opened a portal into the 3rd dimension! That or summoned the dark lord Satan himself who instead of cultivating souls chooses to spend his free time helping little Becky pose in front of her mirror to tease young boys over active libidos. <i style="">Satan you are sick.</i></span></p><p style="text-align: center;" class="MsoNormal"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3J3GuEw0DEqRQUSRkDUo8OH6M24ZWqWPBxy27icmrvpayVEw4Snc9UGVWLBHKnlG9d15GUz8SNp50JLH1ABCh_A32WGHzefCz3VUt183A9LsafqjTulEVr_4op3NWiqHLyPjB2VrFk8b_/s1600-h/Fatgirl1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 314px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3J3GuEw0DEqRQUSRkDUo8OH6M24ZWqWPBxy27icmrvpayVEw4Snc9UGVWLBHKnlG9d15GUz8SNp50JLH1ABCh_A32WGHzefCz3VUt183A9LsafqjTulEVr_4op3NWiqHLyPjB2VrFk8b_/s320/Fatgirl1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5424519144265246578" border="0" /></a><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";font-size:130%;" ><span style="font-style: italic;">So instead of this</span></span></p><p style="text-align: center;" class="MsoNormal"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi76iEch23RzeN3k9EjplcDo_Z1tbcCiwxyMT9vrRlMh8Mltb7RPpNs_8CaDd2Q5txYd1KM-rSBYgZld895aNvkc6soAcaY1KsuJQ5GCFQ6SCNTPDvctjJq_bCiSBrit4O588FB-xboRJdV/s1600-h/FatgirlBody.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 267px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi76iEch23RzeN3k9EjplcDo_Z1tbcCiwxyMT9vrRlMh8Mltb7RPpNs_8CaDd2Q5txYd1KM-rSBYgZld895aNvkc6soAcaY1KsuJQ5GCFQ6SCNTPDvctjJq_bCiSBrit4O588FB-xboRJdV/s320/FatgirlBody.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5424521899792585650" border="0" /></a></p><p style="text-align: center;" class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-style: italic;">You drive 4 hours to shake hands with beef</span></p><p style="text-align: left;" class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);">(Anyone who wanted the Beautrice Author memorial page please go here: </span><a style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);" href="http://www.lgt2.com/bea/">http://www.lgt2.com/bea</a><a style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);" href="http://www.lgt2.com/bea/">/</a><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);"> to pay your respects. I know I spend nights wishing her sweet lips were on mine)</span></span>
<br /></p> Champskiezhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09946285321461982637noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8565398612384460857.post-65272121314409037512010-01-08T14:36:00.000-05:002010-01-09T12:07:40.749-05:00Best Fails of the YearI just LOVE to watch stupid people hurt themselves, and this video contains a serious amount of this. If I could make one complaint about this, it is that the reactions (which are usually the best part) have been cut out of most of these, so the constant barrage of fail doesn't allow for you to catch your breath and prepare for the next instance of idiocy (also you don't see exactly how hurt these people are, or for moralfags out there, if they are OK and therefor, if you can laugh at them).<br /><br /><object type="application/x-shockwave-flash" data="http://www.collegehumor.com/moogaloop/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=1927354&fullscreen=1" height="360" width="480"><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"><param name="movie" quality="best" value="http://www.collegehumor.com/moogaloop/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=1927354&fullscreen=1"><embed src="http://www.collegehumor.com/moogaloop/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=1927354&fullscreen=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" allowscriptaccess="always" height="360" width="480"></embed></object><div style="padding: 5px 0pt; text-align: center; width: 480px;">See more <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/videos">funny videos</a> and <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/pictures">funny pictures</a> at <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/">CollegeHumor</a>.</div>MikeCulhanehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10723389076472212949noreply@blogger.com0